One of the things a blogger is supposed to do for their readers if they want to keep their readers is to post new writing consistently. In the last post I said I would talk more about emotions. I think that's why I haven't written all week. I feel a little like Tom Hanks in Cast Away. For four years his best friend is a volley ball. Then he’s rescued, he showers, shaves and puts on some new clothes, but it's going to take him awhile to acclimate to society again.
I know a lot of people like myself that live around people every day but remain on an island emotionally. I’m sure there are many reasons we retreat to our islands, but I think fear is what keeps us there. My therapist once said that the same tools I used to survive emotionally as a child are going to kill me as an adult. In other words, I need to make a raft and get off my island. I need to interact with my husband, family and friends at a deeper level than figuring out the bills, work schedules and lunch dates. I need to risk sharing emotions even when I think they might start a conflict or risk telling someone how I feel knowing it might hurt them. I need to risk my feelings of safety and security in order to feel intimacy. People aren’t wired to go through life alone. The alternative? Create a best friend out of an inanimate object like Wilson, the volleyball. A volley ball won’t hurt my feelings or leave me, but it also won’t tell me the truth, love me or push me to become a better person.
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