Sorry, You're Stuck With Me

One of our family's favorite TV shows is Modern Family. Claire is a mom on the show.  She's the high energy, crack the whip, neurotic mom.  Her husband, Phil, is the softy, play with the kids kind of Dad.  He is shaken up in the latest episode because his neighbors are getting divorced.  He's shaken because they seemed like a happy, perfect couple.  With his neighbors perfectly happy marriage breaking up, he starts to worry that his marriage might be in trouble and he doesn't even know it!  Meanwhile, Claire is being her neurotic self and planning the perfect Halloween evening with everyone in her family playing a role when the trick or treaters come to the house.  Of course, no one does it the way she wants it done and she is frustrated because she's a control freak.  Phil finally gets Claire's attention by the end of the show to explain that he's worried about their marriage.  At the same time Claire realizes how crazy she is and that she has again stepped over the line to make everyone do crazy things to make her happy.  When Phil questions her about whether they are ok, she says, "don't worry, you're stuck with me."  JB and I relate a lot to Phil and Claire.   I'm fairly unpredictable and neurotic and controlling.  JB is a guy, so he has no idea what I'm thinking most of the time and I give him plenty of reasons to wonder about our marriage, but when it comes right down to it, I very often say something to the effect of, "you're stuck with me." 

I'm almost done with my book, "Controlled Chaos" so I have my sites on the next book, which is going to be about marriage.  The reason I want to write this book so much is because I know so many people with troubled marriages and I know I can write from a perspective of, "If we can make it, anyone can make it!"  I think people have this idea in their minds that marriage is supposed to be about love and happiness, because that's what we learn from the media.  Love and happiness are only the tip of the ice berg, there's also commitment, loyalty, selflessness, convenience, responsibility, duty, promises, etc, the list goes on and on.  I think when I feel love and happiness about my marriage it's not because I have all the above traits.  It's because I don't have many of those good traits, but I am working and fighting through them and when we make it to the other side of one of those arguments/fights/silent treatments, we feel closer.  It's sort of like my running.  I don't run because I like how it feels.  I run because I like how I feel after I'm done. 

So, after watching Modern Family tonight, Claire helped me out a ton, because she gave me the perfect title which sums it all up, "Sorry, You're Stuck With Me."  I think that will go nicely next to "Controlled Chaos".