Six O'Clock in my new Midnight

One of the exercises I read about that writers do when they're stuck is to write a stream of consciousness which means you just write whatever comes to mind without any breaks punctuation    basically anything goes   that way you don't get stuck on rules and perfectionism and wondering if anything you write is good enough or if your gift is just one of those that doesn't matter that much because you don't use it 99 percent of the day so you feel totally worthless because you don't keep appointments without great effort and you forget stuff and your a little disorganized, etc.....so today even though this is killing me a little i'm just going to write whatever comes to mind for another two hundred words because it's been a long time since I've posted anything here and every time i sit down to do so i can't think of anything to say that i want to tell anyone.  sure there are plenty of things going on in my head, but I really don't want those things out on my blog for anyone to read because i know that just because i don't care about something doesn't mean the people close to me don't care and maybe whatever it is i wanted to write wouldn't be ok with them which is one of the reasons it's so hard to finish my book.  there's a lot in there that i don't know that i want out into the hands of anybody and there will be things about my family that they might not want out there and i love them too much to give up our great family get togethers just to write a book, so i better make sure i leave time for them to read this book before i actually want to publish it because i need their ok before i do it. 

I really really really want to delete all this and walk away from my computer because it doesn't even make sense, but i think i'll keep it here, because it's a start and i need to start somewhere.  thanks for reading my blog.  And if you've every commented or asked me about my blog you have no idea how much i appreciate that because it's the only reason i come back here and write another post.